New School Pictures

I have decided (I am sure I said this last year) that instead of paying $100 for 1 shot of each kid that I was going to use that and pay for good pictures.  This year I was lucky enough to have made an amazing photographer friend and she took these pictures for me.  I can't believe how big my kiddos are getting!!!

Thank you Cali!!!  They look amazing!!

Thoughts

I was thinking tonight while I am here by my self yet again that I think I know why it is that I feel like time flies so fast.  I think it is because I live for Friday's.  I spend all week just getting through the day.  I have been waiting for the last year since my dad died to get back to normal.  To get back to my life.  I have been waiting around for something to seem normal again.  I just make it through another day.  Because it will be better and not as lonely when Troy gets home.  I wish I knew what it takes to just realize that this is normal.  I can't live like this for long.  I long for days when I don't have to go any where.  Mostly because when I go somewhere it isn't because I want to go or its something fun.  It is usually something I have to do or something that has to get done.  I am now in charge of all my mom's medical care.  It is like I have had another child but this child thinks they can take care of themselves and can do all the things adults can do.  But she just can't.  I worry constantly, CONSTANTLY!!! I feel like I am too worried about Troy being gone and being alone and my mom being alone and on her own and taking care of all her needs from 15 min. away that I can't concentrate on what I have right here in front of me.  I was too busy to be here when Mikayla registered for high school.  HIGH SCHOOL PEOPLE!!!!! I keep telling her to get off her ipod and be in the present, but I don't feel like I am in my own present.  I guess it is just depressing.  I am not sure how to pull my self out of it.  I am grateful for my wonderful friends that help me to pull my self out of it every once in a while.  That help me laugh and remind me that I am a person and not just somebodies care taker.  I am grateful for my brother and sisters that take a lot of the burden so that I don't have to bear it alone.  In fact they take a lot more of it then I do so I can't imagine how they are feeling!  Anyway enough ranting from me.  G-night all!

St. George

A couple of weekends ago we were invited to go down to St. George for the weekend with our friends Alyssa and Matt.  We had such a great time!!!  I can't wait until we do it again!!!

We started off with a little shopping.  Troy needed a new pair of shoes!!

 Then we went to dinner at the spaghetti factory.  The boys wanted to see what this little room was.  I wasn't sure how to explain what a phone booth was.  ;-]

 We then went to the park and let the kids ride the carousel.  They make me a little sick, ok really sick so I took pictures!!

 That night Alyssa and I went to get groceries for the hike the next day and breakfast and dinner.  Is it my fault that there was a fantastic frozen yogurt place just down the street?!

 Sam got a hold of my phone and took a picture of Mikayla.  I thought it would be a good idea to show how addicted to her ipod that she is sitting on the floor by the plug because it was going to die!

 On Saturday we went on a hike with Alyssa's parents.  It was such a beautiful place!  There are the kiddos and Alyssa's mom.  It is just after this that I feel down and twisted my ankle and banged my knee up pretty good.

We then went on another hike to see the waterfalls.  This was an amazing place.  I almost wish it was warmer so the kids could get in the water.

I have decided that we are going to take the kids to zions sometime soon.  They had such a great time!  They loved the hike and asked us to take them on a hike close to home too.  Thanks to Matt and Alyssa for the great idea!!!!